O čemu pišem

Putujući pješice dugom stazom koja vodi ka Santiago de Camposteli nabasah na jednu zanimljivu knjigu. Našao sam je na stolu sobe u Traben-Trarbachu (Njemačka) gdje sam zanoćio, po svoj prilici zaboravio ju je neki Holanđanin, također gost ove iste hodočasničke postaje i konačišta. Knjiga-priručnik, pisana njegovim jezikom, učila je kako svu godinu i svih 365 dana “hodočastiti” prema uspjehu, osjećati se pobjednikom, u poslu, još više u životu***). Listajući je, nađoh priču koja odmah privuče moju pažnju. Dolazila je iz davnina, iz nekih drevnih mitskih zapisa. Kada je pročitah, shvatih da ona na određen način govori o putovanju i traganju o kojem i sam pišem. Pa pomislih da ta priča može uvesti čitaoce u teme o kojima govorim, i naznačiti crvenu nit koja s proteže kroz svo moje pisanje.

Evo kako priča ide:

“Davno jednom odlučiše bogovi da stvore kosmos i svijet cio. Prvo napraviše zvijezde, sunce i mjesec. Pa zemlju i sve na njoj. Onda stvoriše čovjeka, bistra i radoznala, čovjeka s bezbroj sumnji i pitanja. Za kraj smisliše i odgovor na sva njegova pitanja. No, to zadnje im odmah stvori problem: gdje da sakriju odgovor kako ga ljudi ne bi lako i brzo našli? Zamislili su bogovi, naime, da to traganje bude jedna neobično duga i neizvjesna avantura za čovjeka

“Hajdemo odgovor na sva pitanja položiti na dno okeana”, reče jedan od bogova. “Tamo će ga teško pronaći.

“Bolje da ga sakrijemo na nekoj dalekoj planeti”, kaza drugi.

“Ne, još bolje ga je zakopati u tami najdublje pećine što postoji”, doda najmanji od njih.

Nakon duga vijećanja, najstariji i najmudriji bog reče: “Sakrit ćemo odgovor na sva pitanja unutar čovjeka, u ljude, u njih same. Pa će onda pretražiti čitav svemir, ne sluteći da odgovor u sebi imaju.”

————————————————————————-

Ova posuđena kratka priča tanana je naznaka onog što pokušavam reći kroz svoje knjige i pripovijesti. U njima ja kazujem o svojoj čežnji, o dugom lutanju i traganju za skrivenim odgovorom na meni velika pitanja, o decenijskom putovanju i potrazi za spoznajom meni najveće tajne što je u tom odgovoru zaključana. Tu neizbježno govorim i o događajima što su me na toj stazi pratili, o ljudima koji su me tom stazom vodili, na njoj mi putokaz bili.

U knjigama i zapisima o tom dugom putovanju sažet je cijeli život jedan, sva istina koju spoznah. Istina za kojom tragah svugdje po svijetu, da bih je na kraju našao tu u blizini, nadohvat ruke mi, pa još i bliže. Istina je to o ljubavi što je odskora iskusih, o snazi njenoj neviđenoj, sili koja čuda činiti zna, planine u more pomjeriti može. Svjedočanstvo je to o toplini čarobnoj što u srcu prebiva, a koja je moćna, svemoćna, baš kao Bog što je.

————————————————————————-

***) David de Kock & Arjan Vergeer: ‘365 dagen succesvol – jouw beste jaar ooit’, Spectrum, Utrecht, 2012

Me, in Traben-Trarbach, Germany

Themes of my books

Walking along the endless path that leads to Santiago de Campostel, I came across an interesting book. I found it on the table of the room in Traben-Trarbach (Germany) where I spent the night. In all probability it was forgotten by a Dutchman, also a guest of this same pilgrimage station and inn. The book-manual, written in his language, taught how to make a “pilgrimage” to success during all 365 days in a year, to feel victorious, in business, even more so in life***). Flipping through it, I found a story that immediately caught my attention. It came from ancient times, from some old mythical records. When I read it, I realized that it speaks in a certain way about the journey and search that I myself write about. So I thought that this story can introduce readers to the topics I’m talking about, and indicate the red thread that runs through all my writing.

Here’s how the story goes:

“Once upon a time, the gods decided to create the universe and the whole world. First, they made the stars, the sun and the moon. Subsequently, the earth and everything on it. Then they created a man, bright and curious, a man with countless doubts and questions. Finally, they came up with an answer to all his questions. However, the latter immediately created a problem for them: where should they hide the answer so that people would not find it easily and quickly? Namely, the gods intended for this search to be an unusually long and uncertain adventure for man

“Let’s put the answer to all the questions at the bottom of the ocean,” said one of the gods. “It will be difficult to find him there.

“We’d better hide it on some distant planet,” said another.

“No, it’s even better to bury him in the darkness of the deepest cave that exists,” added the smallest of them.

After a long deliberation, the oldest and wisest god said: “We will hide the answer to all questions within man, in people, in themselves. And then they will search the entire universe, not realizing that they have the answer within themselves.”

————————————————————————-

This borrowed short story is a good indication of what I try to say through my books and stories. In them, I talk about my longing, about my endless wanderings and search for the hidden answer to my big questions, about my decadelong journey and my search for the knowledge of the greatest secret that is locked in that answer. Inevitably, I also talk about the events during the journey and about the people whom I met on that path, who were my guide on it.

In the books and other records of that long journey, my entire life, all the truth that I have come to know, is summarized. The truth that I was looking for everywhere in the world, to finally find it nearby, within reach, and even closer. It is the truth about love that I have experienced recently, about its unprecedented strength, a force that can work miracles, can move mountains into the sea. It is a testimony of the magical warmth that resides in the heart, and which is powerful, all-powerful, just like God is.

————————————————————————-

***) David de Kock & Arjan Vergeer: ‘365 dagen succesvol – jouw beste jaar ooit’, Spectrum, Utrecht, 2012